When I was a child, my brother John once said to me that at the end of the rainbow there is always a pot of gold. As an innocent child, I instantly believed in his words. Then, I asked him, “Brother, why does it need to rain before a rainbow would appear?” He then replied me with a question,” Don’t you like the rain?” I just answered him with silence.
When I was a kid, I was greatly dependent to my eldest brother John. My father worked away from us and my mother used to go out-of-town to manage our business and visit my dad so the task of being the mother and father to me and my second brother was given to him when he was just eleven years old. My eldest brother really handled well his responsibilities. He looked over us and managed the house at an early age. I still couldn’t forget what he did ten years ago when the wind was too strong and the rain poured angrily in the small municipality of Cuyo from the islands of Philippines. My brother and I urgently needed to go to Puerto Princess City in Palawan by riding a ship. I was six and my brother John was twelve. It was our first time to ride in an old and rusty ship under a bad weather just the two of us. That journey was really frightening. The night came and I can’t sleep because of the noisy machinery of the ship and of fear. A loud clanking of iron was heard. The machinery and turbines stopped. It was then we realized that the ship was just floating in the middle of the vast space of sea. I innocently asked my brother if we were going to die but he just calmly answered, “Let’s just close our eyes and sleep”. At that time, I don’t know what a 12-year old kid was thinking saying those words to his 6-year old sister. I just obeyed him. I woke up and saw a white light. I thought I was in heaven but then I realized that we amazingly reached our destination. As we left the ship I asked him why he just told me to sleep. He simply answered, “I know you can’t swim so it would be better to die peacefully than to struggle yet I will just also sleep with you”. After hearing his nonsense reason I curiously asked him why he would also sleep (I know he could swim and possibly survive if ever we sank). He smilingly answered, “So that you will not die alone.” I was shock and involuntarily punched him. At that day, I realized my brother knows how to sacrifice himself for others.
Unfortunately when my brother John reached fifteen he needed to undergo an operation because of brain tumor. Our parents brought him to Manila to have his operation. We were just an average family receiving an average income enough for our needs. So the sudden operation was really a crisis to our family budget but through our relatives, friends and God’s grace my brother was able to undergo the operation.
While they were all in Manila, I was left in the house with my second brother Mark. My brother was fourteen and I was nine. My second brother was a bit irresponsible compared to my eldest brother. I always got mad at him but because of our situation I learned how to become independent. I tend our garden and feed the chickens so that I will have something to eat. One day, I got sick and it was one of the loneliest days of my life. It was the day when no one was there to take care of me.My brother Mark got home and handled me some medicine. I was wrong. I was really never alone.
It was only my Mom and my eldest brother John who went home after the successful operation. My Mom and my Dad broke up after the operation. It was really a surprise for us… a bad surprise. In my whole entire life I didn’t even see them shouting or arguing but still they ended up like that. Ever since I was a child what I just always prayed for is a complete and happy family but still it happened. Life is too short to have regrets so we must move on. My brother John finished engineering despite of his weak body. Unfortunately, after his graduation a brain tumor appeared again leaving his body dependent to other’s help. He is improving now and we still believe that everything will be alright. My brother Mark who usually stays away from home now has his art business. My Mom stayed strong for us and never failed to let us feel that we still have a mother to lean on. Every time I look in my family I know everything has changed.
Some people say it‘s a tragedy; for me it’s a blessing. A kind of blessing I don’t want to exchange for a perfect life. It helped us to help each other and especially it taught us how to keep our faith in Him. As a part of the family, I could also feel the excruciating pain they feel. That pain creates the strongest armor inside of me. I am strong enough to strengthen my eldest brother’s will to live, resilient enough to protect my mother and brother and able enough to forgive my father.
As I ended, I thought it was raining but then I realized that rain came from my eyes. When my brother John asked me if I don’t like the rain the truth is… I really don’t dislike it as long as I know that there will always be a rainbow after the rain.
hiramiyoh 